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40 Short White Jokes

Posted on June 1, 2011 at 3:44 PM

How did the white boy come out of the grocery store with a six pack?

He walked in and payed for it.


How do you stop five white guys from raping a white woman?

Throw them a golf ball.


How long does it take for a white women to take a crap?

9 months.


How many white girls does it take to screw in a light?

None, white girls can’t screw


How many white men does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One, white men will screw anything.


How Many White People Does it Take To Screw In a Lightbulb?

None They’ll Have a Nigger Do it!


What did a white guy see when he looked at his family tree?

A straight line!


What did the white man do before his blood test?

He studied.


What did the white woman do after she spilled hot coffee on her legs?

File a lawsuit.


What do Mickey Mouse and Michael Jackson have in common?

They are both black people with white faces.


What do u call a bunch of white people in a bowl?



What do you call 500,000 white guys jumping out of a plane?



What do you call a bunch of white guys in a circle?

A Dope Ring!


What do you call a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench?

The NBA.


What do you call a mob of white people at the University of Maryland burning down the city?

A Maryland championship.


What do you call a mob of white people in Alabama?

A lynching.


What do you call a mob of white people in Detroit burning down the city?

A hockey victory.


What do you call a white cop?

Police brutality.


What do you call a white guy on “Jeopardy?”

A contestant.


What do you call a white guy who needs to go somewhere across town but does not own an automobile?

A taxi.


What do you call a white man in court?

The lawyer.


What do you call a white man in the ghetto?

A victim.


what do you call a white woman with a yeast infection?

Crackers with cheese.


What do you say when you see a white man carrying a TV?

“Excuse me sir, you dropped your receipt!”


What does a white man do at the club?

Pout while all the colored folk are bumpin’ & grindin’ with all of his fine white bitches.


What does a white man do when he is unhappy with current government decisions?

He writes a letter.


What does a white man say when he catches his wife cheating on him?

“I forgive you”


What does a white woman and a tampon have in common?

They’re both stuck up cunts.


What does a white woman make for dinner?



What’s Orange White and Very Beautiful?



What’s the difference between a white man and a snake?

One is a evil, cold-blooded, venomous, slimy creature of Satan, and the other is a snake


What’s the difference between a white whore and a bitch?

The white whore would screw everybody in the room and the bitch would fuck everyone but you.


What’s the flattest surface to iron your jeans on?

A white girl’s ass!


What’s white and fourteen inches long?

Absolutely nothing!


Why cant white men jump?

They were too busy making racist jokes.


Why did the white man cross the road?

Because he needed something that was on the other side of the road.


Why did white people own slaves?

They were not strong enough to pick cotton – weak bastards.


Why do so many white people get lost skiing?

It’s hard to find them in the snow.


Why do white people like to play hockey?

It’s the only other way to beat something black up if they’re not a cop.


You know what sucks about being white?

Not much, really. I mean, there are starving people in Africa, and all those tsunami victims in Asia…I’d say we’re pretty lucky.

Categories: Funny Racist Jokes, Funny Short Jokes

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Reply fishap
2:02 AM on June 2, 2013 
whats 3 things white people never heared of?
dollar menu, food stamps, and Ass woupins!!!
Reply Fishap
1:58 AM on June 2, 2013 
what do white people smell like when they are wet?
Reply shane
9:39 PM on May 25, 2013 
What do you call a bunch of white people swimming in the ocean ?
The Antartic
Reply Jafet
6:05 PM on May 25, 2013 
This is so funny
Reply roe roe
4:04 PM on April 26, 2013 
This was not funny all these jokes were lame .Sorry try it one more time
Reply Ran
3:13 AM on February 8, 2012 
I am a Chinese and i think this is lame shit. The black and mexican jokes are much funnier than that.
Reply Ryan
5:07 AM on December 29, 2011 
I'm white and to be honest theblack jokes areacuualy clever and the white jokes are just dumb and most don't even make sense
Reply mr.bosy
11:46 PM on December 28, 2011 
how can a crap be white?
Reply Joey
11:15 PM on December 17, 2011 
Most of these jokes are saying whites are better then blacks... It's so true
Reply ashley
9:12 PM on December 10, 2011 
these aren't really jokes. the punchlines are just saying the exact opposite of the black jokes. good try though....
Reply key dinsmore
4:47 PM on November 27, 2011 
no there isnt much racist against white people in these jokes the racist shit is toward the darker peoples so im sure white folk wrote them yo i got a question tho joke whatever if black aint shit no good and so inferior why do we stay on the most powerfull peoples on the earths mind? OH thats right because evn after 400 years of lies murder rape and hatred were still the god of the universe literally all your lil relious shit is about us teaching you animals how to be civilized and were always on ya mind cuz the minute we decide to take the iunivers from u youre not even going to be a real obstacl sabali patience peace
Reply Jonny
5:26 PM on November 25, 2011 
This is obviously some black guy trying to get payback on the all black jokes...which is fair enough.

However... most of the usual black guy jokes are funny cus they play on stereotypes.

These aren't really jokes...more just statements essentially saying "I don't like white people"
Reply johnnyboy
5:24 PM on November 5, 2011 
I'm a white boy and I like to screw so what are you talking about?
Reply partygirl
5:17 PM on November 5, 2011 
My cat is gray and has a huge weener.
Reply kaylen
5:08 PM on November 5, 2011 
I didn't get any of those jokes at all.

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